Shop Till You Drop

A Gentleman’s Guide, Samy Liechti, Blacksocks.com founder

So your lady friend has dragged you to the mall despite your protestations, is draping her shopping bags on you like you’re a Christmas tree, and is trying on her tenth identical little black dress. What’s a gentleman to do under these trying circumstances? Read on to find out.

• “Keep Calm and Carry On.” A courteous demeanor under duress is the mark of any true gentleman. There will always be indecisive shoppers who are short on time and frayed of nerve. What you can do, however, is recite these reassuring words to yourself whenever you feel yourself losing your cool—then take pleasure in your ability to imitate an ocean of calm while everyone is having a meltdown all around you.
• Quit shoving. Tempting as it may be, don’t use your shopping cart to ram into people at the checkout or push your way through a crowd. Politely request people to move aside by saying “excuse me.”
• Shopper, Descending a Staircase. When going up and down stairs, ideally you should be behind your lady friend when going upstairs, and in front of her on the way down. The same applies to escalators, where you always stand on the right and walk on the left. Above all, the lady accompanying you should enter and leave an elevator first. If possible, other women should too.
• Good timing. Avoid sallying forth on a shopping excursion on the one Saturday there’s a clearance sale, or during the post-Thanksgiving and pre-Christmas rush. Shopping on weekday evenings is smarter.
• Be polite. Even if you’ve have been shopping for the last six hours. Snarkiness and sulking help no one when Banana Republic is about to close and all your companion has found is a scarf. Make sure she’s having fun picking out her favorite colors, materials, and styles.
• Don’t let money become an issue. When making large purchases, it’s best to agree on your budget before the shopping trip begins.

And should you ever be at a loss, simply allow serenity and friendliness to guide you through a shopping trip that’s fun and relaxed. Additional “A Gentleman’s Guide” tips can be found at Blacksocks.com.

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